Tuesday, May 30, 2017

But I Thought Piranhas Were Native to South America, or Thoughts on Piranha 3DD

A Sequel to Piranha 3D (2010), which was in turn a remake of Joe Dante’s 1978 Piranha, Piranha 3DD (2012, “Twice the Terror, Double the D’s) and absolutely no apology to Russ Meyer, takes the tried and true summer movie formula of bikinis and blood and sets it in an adult-themed water park complete with stripper lifeguards.   The movie opens when fishermen Clu Gulager from Return of the Living Dead (1985) and Gary Busey find an exploding dead cow full of piranha eggs (hold on).  The eggs hatch in the lake (of course) and are somehow attracted to chlorine (science?), swim through the sewers and make it into the topless water park, and there’s your movie.  Where did those piranha eggs come from?  Does it really matter?  What more do you want, it’s summer.
David Koechner from Anchorman (2004) though you probably know him as Todd Packer from The Office is perfectly cast as the sleazy owner of the sleazy water park.  Also with Katrina Bowden from Nurse 3D (2013) and Tucker and Dale vs. Evil (2010) as Shelby, who goes skinny dipping and gets a piranha up her hoo-hah (I believe that’s a medical term), and loads of  cameos ranging from David Hasselhoff to Ving Rames.

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